Mother's Day Brunch

My sister-in-law and I hosted a Mother's Day brunch for a few of our friends this past Saturday and I had such a blast. The initial idea was inspired by Coffee+Crumbs, and while I didn't use any of the materials they provided, I was so grateful for the idea.

From the beginning, I envisioned it being somewhat multi-generational (we have a family friend who is turning 94 this year and has not only great-grandchildren, but great-great-grandchildren!) and full of delicious special food, the kind we make for our girlfriends (never wasted on little people). 

I was really proud of the planning and execution of the party. At this stage in my life with tiny people, it can be a challenge to strike a balance between having all those special touches and also living in the reality that I simply don't have time for every detail. This is where other people pitching in helped make it happen.

First of all, it was a potluck, so I didn't have to do all the food. I did a cheese platter, a caprese salad, my mom's veggie cream cheese and bagels, and a fruit-infused water. I really wanted a carrot cake to happen but it was one of the things that got dropped at the last minute, until David graciously offered to make it. Insert all the heart eyes.

(Others brought: tuna salad, egg salad, deviled eggs, yam and sweet potato galette, fruit salad, quinoa salad, sesame soba salad, shakshuka with sous vide eggs.)

Kathy and I have been playing around with watercolor lately (mostly her, and I've been inspired) so I asked her to help me incorporate some fun touches. Together we made floral patterns on name tags, food tent cards, and some stationery. She even made a bonus piece on a small canvas.

The day was bright and beautiful and the group of ladies who came were spectacular. We had fun conversation (I think everyone felt threatened that Diana would give them our "conversation starters" if they didn't come up with conversation on their own, lol), and did I mention the food was amazing?

To someone (or someones, because I think I can speak for Diana on this, too) whose love languages are food and quality time, this was all the Mother's Day present I needed: the opportunity to host and eat with my friends.

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And now for the meta-notes I need for the future. (I actually went back to another post I wrote when I needed help remembering my own party planning tricks. Most helpful for me are: (1) write down everything, in as many different types of lists as possible - don't evaluate yourself as you're planning, just do it the way your brain works; (2) drop the stupid stuff and weight of dumb expectations; (3) plan on some stuff you're really excited about, even if it seems somewhat frivolous. I think now I can add to this list: (4) trust that it will all work out, and maybe even let people help you with some stuff!)

For this party in particular, it was helpful to:

• have everyone bring a dish (sign-up via Evite; I made generic suggestions in the What To Bring section, which helped make sure there were enough drinks and a balance of sweet and savory dishes)
• have someone bring and set up a 12-cup coffee maker half an hour before the party. (Plus, amazing Vanilla Bean syrup...)
• use our 6' table to set-up food so the kitchen counters are free for prep, which - in an ideal world, not mine obviously - can then be wiped down to look beautiful during the party. One day I'll get there. (Christine, this was something I noticed at your events in February which makes such a big difference!)
• have tent cards available for guests to label the food they brought and any relevant allergy notations

When Diana and I talked about what we would change if we did it again, I couldn't think of anything (other than maybe invite more people next time). All she had to say was, "More meat." ;p

Dear future self,

Here are some tips for parties you are going to host in the future because you love to host parties but hate how sometimes doing stuff you love stresses you out:

1. You are creative, so be creative. You don't have to follow all the rules to have a great event, and who wants to go to a party where the rules are the same as always?

2. Make lists of whatever is on your mind and don't be afraid to re-write those lists as the formulation and envisionment of your plans change, or as the days go by and the items are crossed out and it's closer to game time and you need your list to look very different.

3. Don't be afraid to start just because you have no idea how the heck these lists need to look for you to "feel" organized. Ignore the voice that tells you, "You've planned so many parties and you still don't know how to frame your plan?!"

4. Delegate as much as you can, especially the stuff you don't like to do. There are people out there who would love to do decorations, or plan a game.

5. Even better, cut out the stupid stuff. It's okay to have a party without favors. And it's okay for there not to be a gift-opening time at a baby shower where everyone has to sit and watch the mom-to-be seem surprised while opening everything she already saw was purchased on her registry, and which she put on there in the first place. Plus, she will really like the way you allocated time for the guests to give her their gifts and sneak in some one-on-one time.

6. Even though you dislike excess, plan one or two special touches that you are really excited about, like that blueberry lemon mint infused water. It's so beautiful!

7. If you're hosting at an off-site location, count on having to schlep all your stuff. There are tools that make your job (or the way you like to do your job) easier, and yes, it's annoying to have to bring them with you. But do it anyway. Empty out laundry baskets in advance for this cause. You'll be glad when you can use your stainless steel mini tongs for serving and your tent cards for labeling the dishes.

8. Do, do, do. As much as you love/hate the planning and the analyzing part, you also have to actually do stuff. Break things up into really small bite-sized pieces. Don't be embarrassed about writing down those baby steps on your aforementioned lists. You're a mom, and sometimes to get anything done you have to do it one teensy tiny bite at a time. Do as many of those baby steps as you can in advance. (But don't mix cut strawberries with sliced lemons for your other infused water ahead of time; the strawberries will bleed and you will be sad.)

9. Before/during the party, empower people to jump in and help; they don't need to ask questions of you. Give people enough information about the big pictures and let them know that they can do whatever they see needs to get done in order to have the event run smoothly. They can refill drinks when they see them getting low, refill serving platters, or clear plates. They don't need your permission. (And don't forget to send these people home with all the leftovers, so they can eat on them for a week.)

10, Finally, bring these napkins, but not to the baby shower, duh.