11/29/2017
10/02/2017
Theo(logic)
We have been busy trying to soak up what I experienced as a short-lived summer.
(Yes, Kayla and Linnea, I suppose that exposes my non-nativeness to feel this way about the summer we had!)
At least, that is my excuse for why I haven't blogged in a while about anything, and it's certainly been ages since I've shared what Theo and Emilyn are saying lately.
As usual, I've tried to jot down things in my Notes app, so here is a collection since the last time I wrote about him in February. It's in chronological order so you can keep in mind the context of growing from 3yr1mo to 3yr9mo and through the seasons of winter, spring, summer and now fall. He started preschool last week!
--
After I muttered to myself, "When will it stop raining?" Theo said, "It will stop raining when you go to your nap, in your dreams."
To David, regarding some privilege: "Will you talk it over with Umma?"
"Don't cry Emi, we're almost home."
"Don't laugh; it's not a laughing game."
"Breathe in and out" to himself.
Earlier this year, he asked if he could use sidewalk chalk. Since it was raining a lot, I said, "when it's Spring, we can bring out the sidewalk chalk." One day probably in March, he noticed the pink camilias blooming on the side of the house, and so he said to me, "The camilias are blooming; can we have sidewalk chalk?"
To me, "You don't need shoes on; just your feet." He knows I'm a Berkeley girl.
"I took a picture with my eyes."
When he wasn't ready for me to kiss him goodnight, he told me "Go control your computer" because he knows I usual check my email between putting Emilyn to bed and then saying goodnight to him.
"Nuna is quite the baker."
One day when David was mowing the lawn, David asked him what he wanted to do, since he dislikes the loud noise of the mower. Theo asked, "Can I stay inside and dance?" Kathy, Emilyn, and I were out at that time, so when we came home, we just saw Theo dancing by himself in the living room, and we found out the rest of the story from David.
"Can I come to your house?" He started saying this a couple of months ago, to grandparents whenever we FaceTimed them. Of course they loved this.
Back in April when it was David's birthday, I asked Theo what we should get for his birthday. Without any hesitance, he offered, "Moss killer."
And first thing in the morning on that birthday, he said, "Can we have cake today because it's your birthday?"
Again, earlier in the summer, to one of my friends: "I'm ready for preschool. I go to preschool three times a week for an hour. I start in the fall." (Actually he goes twice a week for two hours.)
Referring to packaged seaweed, "No, don't throw away the silica gel, or else it won't be crispy!"
He started buckling himself into the carseat in April, at 3 years and 3 months. So nice that he can climb in and get buckled himself.
Sometimes before bed, David has all of Theo's monkeys warm up their singing voices for bedtime songs. When they say "mi mi mi mi mi", Theo sometimes says "me me me me mini mini me."
I love watching Emilyn copy Theo's dance moves.
Because Kathy calls Theo her "Chicken Heart" or "Chicken Thigh" etc., Theo started saying "chop chop chop" while he pretends to chop his arm into bite-sized pieces for her to eat.
"Appa, statch me." By which he meant, can you pray that prayer where you ask God to let me grow in wisdom and stature, in favor with God and man?
"I'm going to preach school."
Without prompting, he began a letter to Emilyn, which read, "I love you, I like to climb, I love playing with you."
There's a Vietnamese sticky rice coconut dessert which Theo calls squishy dessert, but the way he says it, it sounds like "kwishy dirt."
"I'm not a baby, I'm a Theo. Don't talk about babies; let's talk about big boys."
One day, I said, "I'm looking for the one who loves Jack Jack (Emilyn)" when I was trying to get Kathy's attention. Theo intervened saying "I love Jack Jack!"
One day he said "The storms of Jesus Christ" maybe because we told him that God controls nature?
"Don't cry Emilyn, I'm here, I'm not going anywhere."
"I want to trick Umma."
"Wake up so I can bother you!"
On a drive, "If I see a tractor, I will tell you."
"We can go on a date? What the??? Tractor??!!"
When I mentioned I needed to go to the pharmacy, he asked if there would be any tractors. At the Farm-acy, duh.
"I don't want cat cookies, there's sugar bugs."
"I'm organizing over there." He has started to "organize" things. Am I really happy about this? YAS.
"I'm sitting on this rice sock so that I don't cough or bless you."
"We have an appleseed tree and two maple trees."
He often mashes together two thoughts into one sentence: "I don't know how to do this?"
"I'm thirsty for salt. Savory."
When I started loosely and slowly weaning Emilyn I had to tell her once, "I'm not going to nurse you right now." Theo overheard and he asked, "Is it because you're growing, and you're a big umma?"
Theo wanted more Milo (an Asian chocolate malted drink), so I told him I would pick up more of it when I went to Evergreen. A week after I had told him that, I mentioned to David that I needed to go to Evergreen. Immediately, Theo said in a robotic voice, "Can-you-pick-up-my-Milo."
One time when David was merging on to the freeway and a car sped up at the last minute to overtake him, Theo yelled out, "Share the road!" (We honestly have never said that out loud so it was really funny.)
David likes to use the speaker/amplifier in the mini-van to imitate airplane pilot monologues (e.g., ":::ssssshhhhhhhhhh::: This is your captain speaking...") so Theo has started doing it as well, only he says, "This is your speaking captain..."
"If I can watch a show with front loaders and a backhoe, then I'll get my hair cut!" Talk about sentence construction.
"Mama, did you make grits for me? I'm hungry for grits."
"My tummy loves warm."
"Look at what happened to my waffle." (It's gone.)
One day when Emilyn was crying in the back of the van, Theo told me, "She wants everything. She wants a nap, she wants to go to the park, she wants her friends." I love how he asked himself a question in his head and then answered it for all of us.
"I know her full name. Ro Ro Ro Ro Emilyn Ro."
He took care of Emilyn's stuffed bunny and treated it like a baby.
When we got in the car one day, he asked for the "joy joy podcast", by which he meant the song "Down In My Heart."
In the middle of summer, "Don't wake me up to preschool!"
When I mentioned that I might pull him out of school to go to Richmond for a few weeks in late winter, he said, "I need my daddy and my nunu. That will be too much. Or I will go with just Emilyn." When I asked, "Then what will Mama do?", he said, "Mama will get a date."
One day Theo was arranging logs on the deck and he called it Silver Lake. I did not comprehend what he was saying until later that week we went to Silver Lake and the parking lake had logs arranged to mark off the parking spaces.
He uses the word "cantilever" and pronounces it "cant-a-leave-er." It's too much.
One morning when David was home during breakfast (it means either the weekend or a weekday he's working late), Theo could tell Emilyn was starting to feel anxious that I'd be leaving to take a walk. All of this was unspoken, until Theo asked me, "You can just walk laps around the kitchen, right?" He knew that she didn't want me to leave.
As soon as Theo gets home from school, he pulls his pants off and yells, "Free!"
And then just yesterday, when I pulled out grapes for dessert during dinner, he said "I want g-r-..." and proceeded to spell a couple of other (wrong) letters. "I want icecream for dessert. G-r-..." because we always spell out the good things.
We met one of Kathy's new floormates this year and her name is Erica. Theo later commented that her name is like "the America flag." Indeed, "Erica" is in America.
--
Alright, now I'm up to speed with Theo. Up next, Emilyn!
P.S. For my own record (since I'm no longer logging everything obsessively in an Excel file, ha! Although, Elizabeth, aren't you glad that I had? ;p), it appears that Theo is dropping his nap. I can't be totally sure, and I think he may still need it on school days, but I'm 90% sure this is happening right now. :'(
P.P.S. Marla, I am totally channeling the "and because it's due, this is what I will write."
(Yes, Kayla and Linnea, I suppose that exposes my non-nativeness to feel this way about the summer we had!)
At least, that is my excuse for why I haven't blogged in a while about anything, and it's certainly been ages since I've shared what Theo and Emilyn are saying lately.
As usual, I've tried to jot down things in my Notes app, so here is a collection since the last time I wrote about him in February. It's in chronological order so you can keep in mind the context of growing from 3yr1mo to 3yr9mo and through the seasons of winter, spring, summer and now fall. He started preschool last week!
 |
| Lol, I suppose I could have cropped this, and then captioned, "Is Theo wearing pants?" |
After I muttered to myself, "When will it stop raining?" Theo said, "It will stop raining when you go to your nap, in your dreams."
To David, regarding some privilege: "Will you talk it over with Umma?"
"Don't cry Emi, we're almost home."
"Don't laugh; it's not a laughing game."
"Breathe in and out" to himself.
Earlier this year, he asked if he could use sidewalk chalk. Since it was raining a lot, I said, "when it's Spring, we can bring out the sidewalk chalk." One day probably in March, he noticed the pink camilias blooming on the side of the house, and so he said to me, "The camilias are blooming; can we have sidewalk chalk?"
To me, "You don't need shoes on; just your feet." He knows I'm a Berkeley girl.
"I took a picture with my eyes."
When he wasn't ready for me to kiss him goodnight, he told me "Go control your computer" because he knows I usual check my email between putting Emilyn to bed and then saying goodnight to him.
"Nuna is quite the baker."
One day when David was mowing the lawn, David asked him what he wanted to do, since he dislikes the loud noise of the mower. Theo asked, "Can I stay inside and dance?" Kathy, Emilyn, and I were out at that time, so when we came home, we just saw Theo dancing by himself in the living room, and we found out the rest of the story from David.
"Can I come to your house?" He started saying this a couple of months ago, to grandparents whenever we FaceTimed them. Of course they loved this.
Back in April when it was David's birthday, I asked Theo what we should get for his birthday. Without any hesitance, he offered, "Moss killer."
And first thing in the morning on that birthday, he said, "Can we have cake today because it's your birthday?"
Again, earlier in the summer, to one of my friends: "I'm ready for preschool. I go to preschool three times a week for an hour. I start in the fall." (Actually he goes twice a week for two hours.)
Referring to packaged seaweed, "No, don't throw away the silica gel, or else it won't be crispy!"
He started buckling himself into the carseat in April, at 3 years and 3 months. So nice that he can climb in and get buckled himself.
Sometimes before bed, David has all of Theo's monkeys warm up their singing voices for bedtime songs. When they say "mi mi mi mi mi", Theo sometimes says "me me me me mini mini me."
I love watching Emilyn copy Theo's dance moves.
Because Kathy calls Theo her "Chicken Heart" or "Chicken Thigh" etc., Theo started saying "chop chop chop" while he pretends to chop his arm into bite-sized pieces for her to eat.
"Appa, statch me." By which he meant, can you pray that prayer where you ask God to let me grow in wisdom and stature, in favor with God and man?
"I'm going to preach school."
Without prompting, he began a letter to Emilyn, which read, "I love you, I like to climb, I love playing with you."
There's a Vietnamese sticky rice coconut dessert which Theo calls squishy dessert, but the way he says it, it sounds like "kwishy dirt."
"I'm not a baby, I'm a Theo. Don't talk about babies; let's talk about big boys."
One day, I said, "I'm looking for the one who loves Jack Jack (Emilyn)" when I was trying to get Kathy's attention. Theo intervened saying "I love Jack Jack!"
One day he said "The storms of Jesus Christ" maybe because we told him that God controls nature?
"Don't cry Emilyn, I'm here, I'm not going anywhere."
"I want to trick Umma."
"Wake up so I can bother you!"
On a drive, "If I see a tractor, I will tell you."
"We can go on a date? What the??? Tractor??!!"
When I mentioned I needed to go to the pharmacy, he asked if there would be any tractors. At the Farm-acy, duh.
"I don't want cat cookies, there's sugar bugs."
"I'm organizing over there." He has started to "organize" things. Am I really happy about this? YAS.
"I'm sitting on this rice sock so that I don't cough or bless you."
"We have an appleseed tree and two maple trees."
He often mashes together two thoughts into one sentence: "I don't know how to do this?"
"I'm thirsty for salt. Savory."
When I started loosely and slowly weaning Emilyn I had to tell her once, "I'm not going to nurse you right now." Theo overheard and he asked, "Is it because you're growing, and you're a big umma?"
Theo wanted more Milo (an Asian chocolate malted drink), so I told him I would pick up more of it when I went to Evergreen. A week after I had told him that, I mentioned to David that I needed to go to Evergreen. Immediately, Theo said in a robotic voice, "Can-you-pick-up-my-Milo."
One time when David was merging on to the freeway and a car sped up at the last minute to overtake him, Theo yelled out, "Share the road!" (We honestly have never said that out loud so it was really funny.)
David likes to use the speaker/amplifier in the mini-van to imitate airplane pilot monologues (e.g., ":::ssssshhhhhhhhhh::: This is your captain speaking...") so Theo has started doing it as well, only he says, "This is your speaking captain..."
"If I can watch a show with front loaders and a backhoe, then I'll get my hair cut!" Talk about sentence construction.
"Mama, did you make grits for me? I'm hungry for grits."
"My tummy loves warm."
"Look at what happened to my waffle." (It's gone.)
One day when Emilyn was crying in the back of the van, Theo told me, "She wants everything. She wants a nap, she wants to go to the park, she wants her friends." I love how he asked himself a question in his head and then answered it for all of us.
"I know her full name. Ro Ro Ro Ro Emilyn Ro."
He took care of Emilyn's stuffed bunny and treated it like a baby.
When we got in the car one day, he asked for the "joy joy podcast", by which he meant the song "Down In My Heart."
In the middle of summer, "Don't wake me up to preschool!"
When I mentioned that I might pull him out of school to go to Richmond for a few weeks in late winter, he said, "I need my daddy and my nunu. That will be too much. Or I will go with just Emilyn." When I asked, "Then what will Mama do?", he said, "Mama will get a date."
One day Theo was arranging logs on the deck and he called it Silver Lake. I did not comprehend what he was saying until later that week we went to Silver Lake and the parking lake had logs arranged to mark off the parking spaces.
He uses the word "cantilever" and pronounces it "cant-a-leave-er." It's too much.
One morning when David was home during breakfast (it means either the weekend or a weekday he's working late), Theo could tell Emilyn was starting to feel anxious that I'd be leaving to take a walk. All of this was unspoken, until Theo asked me, "You can just walk laps around the kitchen, right?" He knew that she didn't want me to leave.
As soon as Theo gets home from school, he pulls his pants off and yells, "Free!"
And then just yesterday, when I pulled out grapes for dessert during dinner, he said "I want g-r-..." and proceeded to spell a couple of other (wrong) letters. "I want icecream for dessert. G-r-..." because we always spell out the good things.
We met one of Kathy's new floormates this year and her name is Erica. Theo later commented that her name is like "the America flag." Indeed, "Erica" is in America.
--
Alright, now I'm up to speed with Theo. Up next, Emilyn!
P.S. For my own record (since I'm no longer logging everything obsessively in an Excel file, ha! Although, Elizabeth, aren't you glad that I had? ;p), it appears that Theo is dropping his nap. I can't be totally sure, and I think he may still need it on school days, but I'm 90% sure this is happening right now. :'(
P.P.S. Marla, I am totally channeling the "and because it's due, this is what I will write."
8/25/2017
"All you hungry people..."
Inspired by both a podcast episode and a book I recently read, I've started incorporating more routine into our meal planning. Instead of seeing that as giving in (i.e., not having the freedom to come up with whatever I want, and exploring new recipes), which I've felt in the past, I've had a mindset shift in seeing it as a way to love my family and love myself better.
Instead of waiting for life to feel less chaotic, I'm proactively injecting a rhythm to inspire margin and calm, something we can all count on. Fewer choices so that we can spend our energy on other things. Less decision fatigue.
I'm still tweaking the system but I wanted to share what has been working for us so far.
Lunches and dinner have a more varied routine, which I may share later, but breakfasts are pretty much set, which is what I really need, at a time of day during which I am not functioning at my peak, and when David is already at work so it's just me and the kids.
We use a mnemonic device for the weekdays, which helps the kids remember what we're eating, and gives them a sense of the pace of the week.
Monday Mush - we alternate between this oatmeal and "grits" (Bob's Red Mill 10-grain cereal that we usually stir shredded cheddar into). Theo loves to tell me he's "hungry for grits."
Tuesday Tacos - breakfast burritos with scrambled eggs, cheese, salsa
Wednesday Waffles - frozen waffles and breakfast sausage
Thursday Toast - sourdough toast with soft-boiled eggs (British-Malaysian style with soy sauce and white pepper) which Theo calls "soup eggs"
Friday Fried Eggs - fried eggs (either over-easy or scrambled) and polish sausage, toast is optional
Saturday - pancakes and bacon (David makes everything)
Sunday - bagels with smoked salmon and all the fixins' (red onion! cucumber! tomato!)
What I love about this is:
Instead of waiting for life to feel less chaotic, I'm proactively injecting a rhythm to inspire margin and calm, something we can all count on. Fewer choices so that we can spend our energy on other things. Less decision fatigue.
I'm still tweaking the system but I wanted to share what has been working for us so far.
Lunches and dinner have a more varied routine, which I may share later, but breakfasts are pretty much set, which is what I really need, at a time of day during which I am not functioning at my peak, and when David is already at work so it's just me and the kids.
We use a mnemonic device for the weekdays, which helps the kids remember what we're eating, and gives them a sense of the pace of the week.
Monday Mush - we alternate between this oatmeal and "grits" (Bob's Red Mill 10-grain cereal that we usually stir shredded cheddar into). Theo loves to tell me he's "hungry for grits."
Tuesday Tacos - breakfast burritos with scrambled eggs, cheese, salsa
Wednesday Waffles - frozen waffles and breakfast sausage
Thursday Toast - sourdough toast with soft-boiled eggs (British-Malaysian style with soy sauce and white pepper) which Theo calls "soup eggs"
Friday Fried Eggs - fried eggs (either over-easy or scrambled) and polish sausage, toast is optional
Saturday - pancakes and bacon (David makes everything)
Sunday - bagels with smoked salmon and all the fixins' (red onion! cucumber! tomato!)
What I love about this is:
- I'm excited about every day because we're never eating the same thing twice in a row, and I get to look forward to the next time we have it.
- Similarly, there's something to anticipate every new day; we're not just living for the weekends.
- I always know what we need to add to our grocery list since we're have staple breakfasts.
- We can incorporate cheats like frozen waffles without guilt because it's just once a week.
- I can prepare the night before where needed.
- The kids eat well because they know that what's in front of them is the option for the day. And if they don't like it, they know they'll get something they like better on a different day. But honestly I think they love everything because I've chosen seven things we all love.
- There are intentional days where we're not stuffing ourselves with gluten, but then there are days we get to enjoy bread.
- I get to have smoked salmon every week! Talk about living your vacation life!
We've been doing this for a month and I'd say it's working well for us. My guess is that when we get tired of one thing, we can swap out that day with something else, and we won't have to toss out the whole plan. The template is there to serve us, not the other way around.
Another ritual we practice during breakfast is to listen to a hymns station on Pandora. It seems to provide us with a soothing way to start the day.
Another ritual we practice during breakfast is to listen to a hymns station on Pandora. It seems to provide us with a soothing way to start the day.
If any of this helps encourage you to incorporate more rhythm and peace into your life, I'd love to hear your thoughts!
7/06/2017
Pho-sho!
Life is full and life is good right now.
The sun is finally here and while we're still making tons of popsicles (these and these currently encompass our repertoire), we are true Asians who can enjoy hot soup even during the summer.
I already loved Andrea Nyugen for her Into the Vietnamese Kitchen, so I was delighted to discover that she had written a book dedicated entirely to pho.
In Pho, she offers three levels of complexity for entering the world of cooking your own pho: quick weeknight pho, pressure cooker pho, and the real deal pho. I appreciate the backdrop of authenticity with shortcuts to make a daunting meal slightly more accessible.
Kayla had no idea I had just checked the book out from the library when she surprised me with this notebook at church on Sunday!
Classic pho with beef is an all-day (if not more) affair, so it's rare that I will endeavor to make it, though I'm always so pleased with myself when I do. When the older kids started living with us, I figured out a cheater rotisserie chicken pho, where I boiled the leftover carcass, added fish sauce, and served it with simple garnishes. I wasn't sure it was a thing (faux pho?) but when I saw Nguyen's inclusion of it in her cookbook I felt vindicated.
Chicken has such a light flavor compared to beef, so it can handle a lighter broth without all the spices that normally accompany the standard beef broth.
I've mentioned before how we love to do noodle bowl (bun) and spring rolls with rotisserie chicken, and this is what we usually do with the carcass and any meat if there is some leftover! You can't beat a cooked chicken for $4.99 (at Costco) that can be stretched into two meals.
I'm including my oversimplified recipe here, even though Nguyen's version is simple enough. I don't even bother to char ginger and onion for the base.
Super basic rotisserie chicken pho
Depending on what we have done with the chicken, we don't always have enough meat for the soup, so I supplement with other proteins like tofu or egg, and I love serving this with broccoli as well, which I blanch in the broth.
1 rotisserie chicken carcass
any leftover meat you have
broccoli or other vegetables (optional)
fish sauce
cilantro, green onions, sliced yellow onion (soak in cold water for 10 minutes)
Thai basil, and limes for garnish
black pepper
sriracha
Boil the carcass in a pot of water (use some or all stock if you have some), at least 1 hour but for as many hours as you have time for. I often add 1/2-1 t of salt, but not too much, as you will season with fish sauce later.
Soak 1 16oz package of banh pho noodles in a pot of (cool) water. I use the same pan that I will later boil them in. (In case you didn't know - which I didn't when I first started making Viet food in 2011 - you want to boil rice noodles in separate water from your broth because of all the starch. Also, the pre-soak is not necessary, but I do find that if I can remember to soak them, it creates a more chewy texture, emulating the fresh version.)
Prep all your garnishes. Before serving, boil the noodles until tender (it takes less time if you've done the pre-soak), and divide the noodles into the diners' bowls. Add chicken, cooked broccoli (if using), cilantro, green onions, yellow onion, and a few grinds of black pepper to all the bowls.
Taste the broth, adding 1-2 T fish sauce to season. Bring it to a good boil and ladle into bowls. Serve with Thai basil and limes, and any of your other favorite garnishes. (I'm not a huge bean sprout person, so...)
Enjoy! :)
The sun is finally here and while we're still making tons of popsicles (these and these currently encompass our repertoire), we are true Asians who can enjoy hot soup even during the summer.
I already loved Andrea Nyugen for her Into the Vietnamese Kitchen, so I was delighted to discover that she had written a book dedicated entirely to pho.
In Pho, she offers three levels of complexity for entering the world of cooking your own pho: quick weeknight pho, pressure cooker pho, and the real deal pho. I appreciate the backdrop of authenticity with shortcuts to make a daunting meal slightly more accessible.
Kayla had no idea I had just checked the book out from the library when she surprised me with this notebook at church on Sunday!
Classic pho with beef is an all-day (if not more) affair, so it's rare that I will endeavor to make it, though I'm always so pleased with myself when I do. When the older kids started living with us, I figured out a cheater rotisserie chicken pho, where I boiled the leftover carcass, added fish sauce, and served it with simple garnishes. I wasn't sure it was a thing (faux pho?) but when I saw Nguyen's inclusion of it in her cookbook I felt vindicated.
Chicken has such a light flavor compared to beef, so it can handle a lighter broth without all the spices that normally accompany the standard beef broth.
I've mentioned before how we love to do noodle bowl (bun) and spring rolls with rotisserie chicken, and this is what we usually do with the carcass and any meat if there is some leftover! You can't beat a cooked chicken for $4.99 (at Costco) that can be stretched into two meals.
I'm including my oversimplified recipe here, even though Nguyen's version is simple enough. I don't even bother to char ginger and onion for the base.
Super basic rotisserie chicken pho
Depending on what we have done with the chicken, we don't always have enough meat for the soup, so I supplement with other proteins like tofu or egg, and I love serving this with broccoli as well, which I blanch in the broth.
1 rotisserie chicken carcass
any leftover meat you have
broccoli or other vegetables (optional)
fish sauce
cilantro, green onions, sliced yellow onion (soak in cold water for 10 minutes)
Thai basil, and limes for garnish
black pepper
sriracha
Boil the carcass in a pot of water (use some or all stock if you have some), at least 1 hour but for as many hours as you have time for. I often add 1/2-1 t of salt, but not too much, as you will season with fish sauce later.
Soak 1 16oz package of banh pho noodles in a pot of (cool) water. I use the same pan that I will later boil them in. (In case you didn't know - which I didn't when I first started making Viet food in 2011 - you want to boil rice noodles in separate water from your broth because of all the starch. Also, the pre-soak is not necessary, but I do find that if I can remember to soak them, it creates a more chewy texture, emulating the fresh version.)
Prep all your garnishes. Before serving, boil the noodles until tender (it takes less time if you've done the pre-soak), and divide the noodles into the diners' bowls. Add chicken, cooked broccoli (if using), cilantro, green onions, yellow onion, and a few grinds of black pepper to all the bowls.
Taste the broth, adding 1-2 T fish sauce to season. Bring it to a good boil and ladle into bowls. Serve with Thai basil and limes, and any of your other favorite garnishes. (I'm not a huge bean sprout person, so...)
Enjoy! :)
6/21/2017
A bit of both
Hi!
When I start to slip off the blogging bandwagon sometimes it's hard to tell if it's because I'm feeling bummed about life or if it's because I've been busy trying to make a great life.
Lately it's been a bit of both.
This (and having my sister-in-law close by) saved me last week during the Week From Hell. (Alex, Wednesday night was the highlight of my week (maybe year haha!), but somehow it made Thursday and Friday just that much more unbearable!)
I could use a Vacation from my Problems!
But my Real Life is also pretty sweet.
And here are some random paradoxes/tensions I've been thinking about lately:
accuracy vs. precision
self-hood vs. community
submission vs. autonomy
being like everyone vs. being unique
feeling content vs. striving for improvement
grief vs. gratitude/pleasure
being conservative vs. having an abundance mentality
feeling hopeful vs. being realistic
Finally, interesting article and cute item.
And also, I need this. But not at that price. It's not OK.
When I start to slip off the blogging bandwagon sometimes it's hard to tell if it's because I'm feeling bummed about life or if it's because I've been busy trying to make a great life.
Lately it's been a bit of both.
This (and having my sister-in-law close by) saved me last week during the Week From Hell. (Alex, Wednesday night was the highlight of my week (maybe year haha!), but somehow it made Thursday and Friday just that much more unbearable!)
I could use a Vacation from my Problems!
But my Real Life is also pretty sweet.
And here are some random paradoxes/tensions I've been thinking about lately:
accuracy vs. precision
self-hood vs. community
submission vs. autonomy
being like everyone vs. being unique
feeling content vs. striving for improvement
grief vs. gratitude/pleasure
being conservative vs. having an abundance mentality
feeling hopeful vs. being realistic
Finally, interesting article and cute item.
And also, I need this. But not at that price. It's not OK.
6/07/2017
Even easier
I've been dragging my feet with regards to posting these days, but I think I have a good excuse.
It's finally (finally!!!!!!!) summer!
I have had big plans to tell you about rediscovering one of my favorite Chinese cookbook authors, and about The Glory That Is Laundry Day, and of course, we are more than overdue on a Theo update.
But the days are getting brighter, longer, and lazier, and so all I have to offer you today is these.
After finding some winter refuge at the computer, I feel the tug to spend more of my time unplugged and outside. We have too many popsicles to eat and too few days.
Ever since I saw Molly Orangette write about these I have been dreaming about making them. For some reason I thought they were more complicated than they really are. But in fact they are really easy, like boozy pudding (something else I need to tell you about later*) but even easier.
(*ehhh, if you're new around here, I've talked about it plenty on the old food blog with Stephie. You're welcome. So embarrassing.)
Anyway, without further ado, and so that I can get back to laying out on the deck, here are the fudgsicles you need in your life today.
adapted from Orangette
If you're fancy, you should definitely read up on Molly's recipe to get all the details about chocolate, because she's obviously thought it through. I've tried to keep it simple and easy here, and it's more for my reference to make it again. She also called for heavy cream and milk; I had lots of half and half so I've simplified it here. Obviously, you can use your brain and do things differently.
8 oz chocolate chips (preferably mixed in with some bittersweet, but don't go all dark)
2 1/2 cups half and half
2 T unsweetened cocoa powder
2 t vanilla extract, or (spiced) rum since vanilla extract costs a million dollars these days
Heat up half and half on the stove with cocoa powder, whisking to dissolve. Remove pan from heat, and after a minute, dump chocolate chips into the pan, whisking until it's all incorporated. Add in vanilla extract and then pour into popsicle molds. Freeze until hard.
P.S. Comment below with a caption for the second picture in this post. The winner gets a fudgsicle!
5/30/2017
Dive in
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| "I have measured my life..." |
Part of me totally wants the permission to quit, although as I say that it sounds so very stupid, and then there's a small voice that says, just dive in again.
This weekend I went swimming in the lake near our house with my friend and her daughters. One of them was hesitant to go all the way in for fear of the cold. I think I told her something to the effect of, "It's not too bad, so if you're planning on coming in eventually, you may as well just get it over with so you can enjoy the rest of the time."
I'm not sure of very many things in my life, but I am sure that I love water, and that I want to be in it always.
I had one of those weeks last week where a few of the mornings I woke up to that mental tape (do you have one?) that just plays the refrain, "I suck I suck I totally suck" over and over again.
I'm still not very sure about this writing thing, or about this sharing thing, or about this life thing (sometimes). This world seems so very big, and I'm afraid it's cold, but I guess if I'm planning on being part of this eventually, maybe I may as well just get it over with and surrender, with faith, knowing that yes, it will be shocking, but that yes, it will also be wonderful.
David asked me the other day what I want to teach my kids, and I think that ultimately, I want them to know that life is very hard, but that life is also very beautiful.
The tension of living between grief and gratitude is part and parcel of being human, and the more I can embrace that, I think the better off I'll be.
--
I picked up some poetry the other day, because I think I need it to slow me down, and to deepen me. I'm married to a poet, but before I knew David I think I felt the way many people do about poetry, that it is written by anguished people and it makes those who read it anguished, too.
I love Billy Collins because of the delight he takes in poetry and his belief that poetry can be accessible. In his well-known poem, "Introduction to Poetry", he teases students for trying to "torture a confession" out of poems, and I love that.
Anyway, this one poem in his anthology, 180, made me laugh out loud this morning and I wanted to share it with you.
Did I Miss Anything?
by Tom Wayman
Nothing. When we realized you weren't here
we sat with our hands on our desks
in silence, for the full two hours
Everything. I gave an exam worth
40 percent of the grade for this term
and assigned some reading due today
on which I'm about to hand out a quiz
worth 50 percent
Nothing. None of the content of this course
has value or meaning
Take as many days off as you like:
any activities we undertake as a class
I assure you will not matter either to you or me
and are without purpose
Everything. A few minutes after we began last time
a shaft of light suddenly descended and an angel
or other heavenly being appeared
and revealed to us what each woman or man must do
to attain divine wisdom in this life and
the hereafter
This is the last time the class will meet
before we disperse to bring the good news to all people on earth
Nothing. When you are not present
how could something significant occur?
Everything. Contained in this classroom
is a microcosm of human experience
assembled for you to query and examine and ponder
This is not the only place such an opportunity has been gathered
but it was one place
And you weren't here
5/18/2017
New-fangled
A couple of weeks ago I was really feeling the overwhelm of technology.
In the last decade since graduating from college, I'd tried to preemptively circumvent the FOMO I knew I would inevitably feel from the engagement of technology by avoiding it as much as I could. But now I feel like I'm some old fogey who, at only 31, just doesn't understand those young people.
How do I stay connected without getting swept away?
Many of you have probably pondered and ruminated over this while I've just had my head buried in the sand. So, please enlighten me. How do you:
(a) utilize technology? (Where does it help and where does it hurt?)
(b) let go of where you aren't totally plugged in?
(c) understand the role of technology in your life?
(Insert smoooooth transition.)
Here are three new-to-me "technological" things I've been enjoying:
1. Using audio messages through iMessage to leave messages that aren't urgent. It's just so much faster for me to convey what I'm trying to say without the worry of typos or an ambiguous tone. It's also much easier to send a message when I have only one hand available, which is often.
2. Facebook groups. So nifty! Yes, I just said nifty, so you can understand just how old-fashioned I am.
3. Okay, I know everyone is going to roll their eyes at me, but I've just discovered the beauty of the drive-thru at the bank. I'm one of those weirdos/extroverts who actually likes to go into the bank and talk to someone and see how they are handling my transaction. But anyway, two kids later, I've come to see the light, and this way I can still enjoy the personal interaction without having to get myself (or the kids, lbh) out of the car.
What technology are you enjoying lately? And, on the flip side, what ways are you finding to ground yourself to the "real"/natural world?
5/15/2017
Speaking of
[Alternate title: 15 things on the 15th, (More than) a few randoms]
1. What we're eating this week:
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| bún / sunday night stew |
3. Speaking of mothers, and in light of Mother's Day last weekend, I found something I made twenty years ago.
When I called her to show her, she laughed and said, "Why do you have this and not me?"
4. Re-reading To Kill a Mockingbird... 'nuff said.
5. My pattern of thin slices of joy is: time with people, sunshine, good food/drink, thifting, good conversation.
5b. We had a picnic on the deck this Saturday and we realized our meals are especially happy when they are a hybrid between take-out and home-made. This was pizza and steak, and the day before we brought over take-out roast duck and chicken wings with home-made cabbage, salad, and rice to a family's move.
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| Not pictured: me taking the photo, Theo searching for worms |
7. This simple matchstick solution has been bringing me disproportionate amounts of joy. I've made three or four of them already out of old votive holders or baby food jars and I can't get over how amazing it is.
We have been loving candles here... I don't know why it took me so long to realize that candles can take a day from gloomy to cozy! Tip: TJMaxx seems to have a great selection and for cheap.
8. Speaking of making the storage of things look pretty, I've been trying to do a lot of that in the house lately. Last-year-me dismissed the Nate Berkuss method of taking the labels off of things, but this-year-me is all about this. A friend was telling me about a family member who will only accept wooden toys in her house, which led her to call them, jokingly, "high-end granola." I laughed, but then later I was, like, that's what I want to be! (Insert thinking emoji.) When I told David that story, he said, "granola is expensive!" Indeed, it is.
9. Speaking of granola, I need to make a batch. Molly's No. 5 is the best, but I need to leave out nuts for the baby, so I'm not quite sure what I'm going to do yet. Even if I hadn't mention #8 above, I've been thinking about granola and other breakfast items because I need more breakfast ideas. I've been avoiding eggs and also nuts, so my protein choices feel limited. We've been eating more sausage for breakfast but I need a little more variety so I've been thinking about prepping grain bowls (like this) or other savory meals (like this) that I can have in the AM - essentially, eating lunch or dinner for breakfast. If anyone has ideas for non-sweet breakfasts that don't involve eggs, I'm all ears!
10. Speaking of oats, have you ever had baked oatmeal? It was better than expected. One person called it the bread pudding of oatmeal, and I know not everyone likes bread pudding, but thinking about it that way made me like this even more.
11. An inspiring typography video of Ira Glass that could be applied to any creative endeavor / learning curve.
12. Princess Kate + vulnerability + social media + mental health awareness
13. A sweet home tour of a blogger I've been following for a while.
14. Speaking of homes, I'm taking The Nester's decorating class right now and my head is buzzing with ideas. It's hard to slow down and know that this just takes time.
15. David and I had a great conversation about rest, quality over quantity, spiritual wealth, and contentedness. What rhythms help you (and your families, if applicable) balance achievement and rest?
5/11/2017
A life well-lived
I'm re-reading Parker Palmer's Let Your Life Speak, which I haven't read in more than a decade. (Remember when I talked about vocation/vacation?) I have to say, it's really speaking to me this time.
Have you ever read a book at just the right time, where you find yourself nodding along to every single sentence in every single paragraph?
I had to stop to breathe and then wipe away tears after reading this paragraph:
"Vocation at its deepest level is not, 'Oh boy, do I want to go to this strange place where I have to learn a new way to live and where no one, including me, understands what I'm doing.' Vocation at its deepest level is, 'This is something I can't not do, for reasons I'm unable to explain to anyone else and don't fully understand myself but that are nonetheless compelling'" (Palmer, 25).
I'm really resonating with the tension between the ego and the true-self. Am I living the life I am meant to live? Of course, there are very valid reasons we run away from our calling, and there are so many (SO many) conflicting messages from all directions (within and without) as to what is a life well-lived.
I'm comforted by the fact that even Palmer went through darkness and shadows, which he believes are integral in the journey towards selfhood, and that he wanted to share with us what he felt few elders were willing to talk to him about when he was in his twenties and thirties.
I could go on and on, and really, the whole thing is just so evocative I am tempted to cut and paste the entire book to my blog, but alas.
Oh, to be a Quaker!
Finally, this whole divine/human interface is making me feel very confused and like it's time for a cheeseburger.
Have you ever read a book at just the right time, where you find yourself nodding along to every single sentence in every single paragraph?
I had to stop to breathe and then wipe away tears after reading this paragraph:
"Vocation at its deepest level is not, 'Oh boy, do I want to go to this strange place where I have to learn a new way to live and where no one, including me, understands what I'm doing.' Vocation at its deepest level is, 'This is something I can't not do, for reasons I'm unable to explain to anyone else and don't fully understand myself but that are nonetheless compelling'" (Palmer, 25).
I'm really resonating with the tension between the ego and the true-self. Am I living the life I am meant to live? Of course, there are very valid reasons we run away from our calling, and there are so many (SO many) conflicting messages from all directions (within and without) as to what is a life well-lived.
I'm comforted by the fact that even Palmer went through darkness and shadows, which he believes are integral in the journey towards selfhood, and that he wanted to share with us what he felt few elders were willing to talk to him about when he was in his twenties and thirties.
I could go on and on, and really, the whole thing is just so evocative I am tempted to cut and paste the entire book to my blog, but alas.
Oh, to be a Quaker!
Finally, this whole divine/human interface is making me feel very confused and like it's time for a cheeseburger.
5/09/2017
One hundred
Here are my "thin slices of joy" from the last week:
1 | visiting with an old friend from out of town (Hi Molly!)
2 | eating homemade whole wheat chocolate chip muffins with the kids on the front deck for a breakfast picnic; having dinner with neighbors
3 | aforementioned neighbors giving us two perfect kid-sized chairs {and the day before a different neighbor walked over and offered to give us her old electric trimmer because she saw David cutting some hedges manually and she didn't need hers anymore}
4 | fun playdate with an old friend from work; sunshine and two boys playing really well together in the dirt for hours
5 | painting Theo's room; also, watching Theo pluck basil for his pizza
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| Pro tip: get a cup of chopped onions from the hot dog condiments area the next time you order a Costco pizza. |
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| mud puddles > tulips |
And here's our menu for the week:
This is my 100th published post! I'm still not sure what this blog is, but I'm glad I'm doing it. I suppose, then, that this is a good reminder that it takes a lot of doing to get somewhere. And that the more you do, the less pressure there is on each instance of doing.
I read somewhere that instead of thinking "One day..." you can say instead "Day One." I like that fresh and hope-filled vision. Instead of thinking "One day, I'm going to live a creative life," I have the choice to say, "This is Day One (or Day Two, Three, or Ten Thousand) of living a creative life." Thanks for following along!
5/04/2017
Fearless
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| I love how these boots make her look like a fishmonger. |
It’s such a wild exercise to pay attention to everything my kids
are doing as they grow and develop. I worry sometimes that “blog summaries” of them oversimplify
their personhood into bulleted lists, but for now, this is still better than not writing anything.
Before I picked up blogging again with regularity, I was only
remembering to capture things here and there, and it really felt like a chore. Now
I’m a bit quicker to jot something down in my Notes app.
Knowing that my collections are headed somewhere (and that you all
really seem to like these! Especially you, Molly, it’s your lucky week!) makes
it feel even more worthwhile.
And I know that in 20 years (or even just next year) I’ll be really grateful I did that. (Ha, I just
used the word grateful and it didn’t make me gag. Maybe it’s because I’m being
grateful to myself, not to some vague Other.)
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| Oh, you didn't know that monkeys are marsupials? |
So, without further ado, a little update on Emilyn.
She started walking just shortly before our trip to Virginia, so I’d
say that was right around the beginning of April, after she turned 15 months.
(Is this so classic second child, that I don’t have the exact day written down?)
Theo was walking just after his first birthday, but nobody was
worried about anything with Emilyn. Nonetheless, I am so happy that the days
are here now that I can take her more easily to the playground and know that
she’s not just going to shred up her pants from crawling.
I didn’t entirely wait for her to be fully walking before letting
her play outside with Brother, though. For the last probably two months, I
threw her out and let her get dirty in the mud and grass in the yard. (Though
we’re still having to constantly tell her “don’t put nature in your mouth.”)
Speaking of playgrounds, she is FEARLESS. She discovered the
slides, and she will climb up and go down, multiple times. Even if it knocks
the wind out of her, she is almost always grinning from ear to ear and ready to
do it again. She loves to try to climb up the slides backwards as well.
She still loves to tickle people’s feet, all while
jibber-jabbering the phrase “ticke ticke ticke” which means “tickle tickle
tickle” if you didn’t catch that.
In general, she talks like R2D2. It’s hilarious when she opens a
book and “reads.”
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| Speaking of Star Wars, doesn't she looks like some SW princess wearing my puffy vest? (And May the Fourth be with you!) |
The funniest thing she started doing this last month is squinting
her eyes at us. Technically, she thinks she is blinking. She did this after
seeing David’s dad putting in eye drops, and blinking to get the excess out. As
soon as she saw him do it, she closed her eyes like a squint and got laughs out
of all of us.
It almost looked as though she was trying to close her eyes while simultaneously watching to see if we were
watching her. That’s what made it look like a squint.
And so obviously now that she knows it bowls us over with
laughter, she keeps it in her back pocket to lighten the mood.
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| It looks a little like this. |
She continues to have the utmost patience for Theo, but she can be
more stubborn with me, David, or even Kathy.
One day I told her, “You’re so easy, until you’re not.”
Other names I call her besides Emily: Emi, Emi-baby, Dolly / Dolly Pie (mostly when I
wake her up), Sister, Sissy Missy, Miss E, Princess Emilyn.
We look at her and wonder, How
can you be so smart for someone who has lived on this earth for little more
than 1 year?
It’s this crazy mixture of her being a second-born and a girl that
makes her incredibly quick and it constantly surprises me how much she knows
and understands. I’m always like, “who taught you that?” Ohhhhh.
She often stays near people / conversation / food, whereas Theo
may run off to bigger and better things. (Read: monster trucks.)
Both of them love to dance, but she dances like an old man: both
feet flat on the ground, hand on tummy, and swaying to the music with her
shoulders. If the song is faster, she may bend her knees to bounce. She gets a glimmer in her eyes when she is excited.
Says: mama, dada, hi, bye, ball, doggie (duck-ga), nuh-nuh (for nuna/Kathy); I think she calls Theo “da”;
I’m really trying to get her to not just go “ehh ehh” while waving her hands towards
anything she wants. Sigh.
Signs: please (by rubbing her protruding tummy, lol), milk, all
done, sister, brother, banana, avocado (we googled and learned “sausage” this
week which was funny; she did her best to repeat it)
Loves: singing, dancing, blowing kisses
Firsts: being put to bed by David while I went out to dinner with
a friend (she kept saying “my mama, mama, me mama” and signing for nursing/milk,
but she did eventually go down without a fuss)
5/01/2017
Thin slices of joy
If you may recall from my can-it-just-be-spring-already? goals list, one of the things I committed to do was to keep track of moments of joy in every day. My friend Stephanie commented on that post and left a link to an article about a Google engineer who has taught people to use the tools of mindfulness to find "thin slices of joy" in their days. I thought that was helpful language, and even the image of that (i.e., those "thin slices") gives me joy.
After publishing that post, I had the idea to use the monthly view on my (paper) calendar to keep track of the moment (or moments) of joy in each square. There was something satisfying about using a calendar as a to-done list more than a to-do, and incidentally it makes it easy to report here on my blog what my thin slices of joy were for the remainder of April since writing that post.
19 | the sweetest puppies ever befriended me, Theo, and Emilyn at the park
20 | good and open conversation; going antiquing downtown (we had randomly decided to go that day, and discovered when we got there that they were suppose to close by the time we arrived, but there happened to be a special event that day that meant they were open later than usual!)
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| The universe sent me a message at the antique store. |
22 | a neighbor walking across the street to introduce herself when I was out on a walk because she's seen me walking for years
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| Also from April 22: the color of Thai banana contrasted against chia seed pudding. (Should I just title this post thin slices of yellow/sunshine/happiness?) |
24 | sunshine (again!); getting to bring dinner over to a neighbor's and eat together
25 | the coconut popsicles from my postscript were really delicious
26 | thrifting and finding awesome books I actually wanted; great dinner/conversation with a friend; listening to a very good podcast
27 | sunshine (yet again!)
28 | playing outside with the kids with my new Bluetooth speakers (why didn't I get these earlier?!) projecting Renee & Jeremy (but alas, also the day I felt dumb trying to figure out Stories on Instagram, thank you slai for trying to make me feel better); providing a recipe and all the ingredients for my sis-in-law to make dinner at her home, which her family ended up loving*
(*If you haven't made sheet pan chicken yet, you are really missing out. Seriously, unless you're a vegetarian or you're allergic to delicious food, you should not be living one more day without this in your life. Sorry to be so bossy. I really need to stop over-selling it and risk you being disappointed. Like, maybe I should change the title of the post to "It's just rice and chicken, nbd.")
29 | conversation with a friend
30 | surprising a friend with a chai at church without even knowing she had forgotten to make her tea that morning (!); going to the Indian buffet by myself (Butter Chicken for President!)
The weird (but perhaps not really that weird) thing is that after I decided to do this whole thin slices of joy thing, my days actually did get better. Even the weather got (incrementally) better. Yes, three sunny days out of 12 is not that great, but I noticed - and savored - those brighter days.
The real trick will be whether this will work in the dead of winter... so friends, if I feel crummy in the winter of 2017/2018, please ask me if I'm doing this still, and remind me to go visit my in-laws to get a break. (I can just go back to the mountain top, right, Marla?)
Anyway, I'm definitely keeping up in May and I invite you to join along!
And now here's this week's menu:
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| Chicken curry. Do it. |
P.S. Let it be known that when I left my computer and came back, David had changed my notes to: thin slices of
P.P.S. My friend Kayla texted me this article about self-care vs. "resourcing" and of course I loved it because the author talks about the function and efficacy of word choice, and while neither Kayla nor I personally resonated with her specific choice of "resourcing," I did enjoy the resourcefulness of her choosing a word that helped her focus on self-care more easily. (This is all in reference to my preferring to think about what I'm "thankful" for vs. what I'm "grateful" for.)
4/28/2017
Awoken
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| Three screenshots of my Overdrive app |
I love that I discovered Overdrive this past year (ebooks are actually not as horrible as I thought they would be; give it a try if you're wary and at least just see what you think!). But I'm also returning to my first love of actual paper copies and it is something lovely.
I showed up early to a dinner date with a friend the other day and got to browse at a nearby thrift store. My soul was awoken simply from getting to touch old fabric-bound classics and skimming book titles with my head turned sideways.
In this last year I've seriously ramped up on my plugged-in time (e.g., blogging, Instagram, texting, even some Facebook when I'm feeling crazy (!)), which for me has actually been good. But when I feel myself getting too wired, I know it's time to pull back, and some of the ways I do that is: (1) get back to reading paper books, (2) consolidating social media and blog reading to certain times of the day, (3) turning on Do Not Disturb and airplane mode as needed.
(It's crazy how something as simple as touching a natural material - e.g., paper made from trees - is at once calming and enlivening, versus touching plastic and glass.)
It's an interesting dance to figure out how to incorporate technology, to find that sweet spot where it's assisting you in your goals without sucking the marrow out of your soul.
David and I have been having some conversations (on the RoCast, our private podcast where we pretend we are famous like Rob Bell and we record ourselves using the Voice Memo app) about technology and the resulting loss of community and connection for Millennials especially, because of where we fall between two differing generations.
Anyway, I'm still figuring out the best way to share what I'm reading, but until then, here's a dump of EVERYTHING. Please chime in with any of your thoughts and/or suggestions!
Books I've finished in the last couple months
- The Magic of Motherhood by Ashlee Gadd and the Coffee+Crumbs Team (own this, love it; it would be a great baby shower gift)
- Quiet by Susan Cain (mentioned in a recent post of mine)
- Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari (it was entertaining to read something that is so Aziz; also, enlightening to see how relationships have changed as a result of technology; the fact that texting > phone calls in 2007 explains my life.)
- Nine Women One Dress by Jane L. Rosen (fun breezy read)
- The Nesting Place by Myquillyn Smith (I love how Myquillyn explains how you should think about decorating, which applies to anyone no matter your style; my take-aways are It doesn't have to be perfect to be beautiful, you can't ruin something you already hate, just get started, you will have to make nail holes in your house and that's okay, try to do as much as you can yourself and save only what you must to bug your husband to do)
- The Road Back to You by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile (great modern intro to the Enneagram)
- Chasing Slow by Erin Loechner (surprised me with its tone and overall was just a unique/interesting read; I wasn't familiar with her before so that perhaps affected my read)
- Notes from a Blue Bike by Tsh Oxenreider
- Falling Free by Shannan Martin
- Untethered by Julie Lawson Timmer
- An Altar in the World by Barbara Brown Taylor (This book really resonated with me and I think I'd like to try to check out a paper copy in the future)
- Commonwealth by Ann Patchett
- A Million Little Ways by Emily P. Freeman
- How to Manage Your House Without Losing Your Mind by Dana K. White
- Me Before You by Jojo Moyes
- Organized Simplictiy by Tsh Oxenreider
- All Grown Up by Jami Attenberg
- Hillbilly Elegy by J.D. Vance
- Big Little Lies by Liane Moriarty
- No Drama Discipline by Daniel J. Siegal (book club book for an online group that I'm lurking in and thinking of jumping in on?)
- Big Magic by Liz Gilbert (hard cover!) - gave it to a friend and also currently re-reading; I mentioned that it was one of the most influential books I read in 2016.
- Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster (also hard cover! can't have too many copies of my 67th favorite book, lol)
- Rising Strong by Brené Brown (also hard cover!) - I'm reading this right now and it's amazing, if anyone cares to join along!
- Quiet by Susan Cain (ask me if you want to borrow it!)
- The Jesus Storybook Bible by Sally Lloyd Jones
Books I'm reading now
- Big Magic by Liz Gilbert (re-read; well, I did listen to the audiobook the first time, which was awesome, so this is my first time actually reading)
- Rising Strong by Brené Brown
- Talking As Fast As I Can by Lauren Graham (just got this today)
- Your Are Your Child's First Teacher by Rahima Baldwin Dancy (also just got this today)
P.S. Our favorite children's book that we recently discovered: Nanette's Baguettes
P.P.S. Links are Amazon affiliate links. You won't spend extra if you purchase anything through these links, but a percentage of the sale will go to supporting the aforementioned RoCast. Just kidding. Maybe.
4/24/2017
This reversal
I recently stumbled across a recipe for Vietnamese chicken curry that captures that brothiness I so love in my food. (In case you've haven't noticed.)
My maternal grandfather's quick-and-dirty Malaysian chicken curry recipe uses a whole can of coconut milk and not very much water (in fact, as little as you can get by without burning the food), but I liked this reversal I found on Hungry Huy.
It calls for only half a cup of coconut milk to 4-5 cups of liquid. He uses a mix of chicken broth and water, but since I stock (couldn't help myself*) Costco's organic stock which isn't very salty, I use all stock in my version for extra flavor.
(*When the cartons of chicken stock in your pantry notice you checking on your supply a lot, do they say, "Are you stocking me?" Souper sorry for that. Not.)
I was pleasantly surprised with how far that half cup of coconut milk went, giving the whole pot just the right amount of creaminess and Southeast Asian flair, and so instead of disregarding the recipe and just throwing the rest of the can in, I decided to make coconut sticky rice with mangoes, because obviously.
One last note on the curry before I share both recipes. While you can serve this over rice, the Viet way to enjoy this is with (Vietnamese, if possible) French bread.
(Okay that was not the last note because I have one more thing to say, as always:)
The leftovers are also amazing with noodles - such as vermicelli, udon, or by making a packet of ramen (spicy or regular) with some of the seasoning and broth, and throwing the curry into it, plus a poached-in-the-pot egg.
Actually, the egg can be eaten on any version of this dish. SEAsians were "putting an egg on it" way before it was the trendy thing to do. If you've never had a crispy fried egg with an oozing egg yolk over a bowl of curry rice, well, then, stop everything you're doing right now and get thee to a kitchen.
Vietnamese Chicken Curry (cà ri gà )
adapted from Hungry Huy
2 lb bone-in chicken thighs and drumsticks, marinated in 2 t salt and 2 T curry powder
1 large yellow onion, diced
4 cloves garlic, minced
2 stalks lemongrass, cut into 5" lengths (smash the base to expose more flavor, and cut lengthwise in half, if desired)
3 bay leaves, or a few stalks of curry leaves, if you are so lucky to have access
1 1/2 lb potatoes, cubed (~2")
3-4 carrots, cut into 3" lengths (the chunky look is nice for this soupy curry)
1/2 cup canned coconut milk (full-fat, try to use a Thai - not American - brand)
1 tsp sugar
4 cups chicken broth
extra curry powder to taste (I like Baba's, which can be found at Ranch 99, but a Vietnamese Madras curry powder would be great, too)
fish sauce and/or fermented shrimp paste, to taste
squeeze of lemon and/or cilantro, optional, for garnish
Marinate the chicken at least two hours in advance, or overnight. Don't be afraid to over-salt. This flavor will be dispersed into a pot of broth with over two pounds of vegetables, and salting the pot later can never match the level of flavor you get from pre-marination. (Pre-marinated murder?)
In a heavy-bottomed pot or Dutch oven, sear the chicken pieces in batches and set aside on a plate. Heat up more oil and sweat the onions in the pan. Add minced garlic, stir a few times, then add broth. Return chicken to the pot, along with sugar, bay leaves, lemongrass, carrots and potatoes.
(Hungry Huy has you par-fry the potatoes and carrots so they don't disintegrate into the broth, but I'm giving you the lazier version. Just cut your vegetables larger, and watch them so they don't melt.)
Bring to a boil, then lower and let simmer until everything is cooked, probably about 20 minutes. Stir in coconut milk. Taste for salt and add fish/shrimp sauce if it needs some extra funk. Serve with cilantro and lemon and with French bread.
Coconut Sticky Rice with Mangoes
1 1/2 to 2 cups Thai sweet rice
1 1/2 cups coconut milk (conveniently, what you will have leftover after you make the above recipe)
1/3 cup white sugar
1/4 t sea salt
2 mangoes (Champagne/Manila/Ataulfo are the best for this, as they are sweeter and less fibrous), cubed or sliced
Make sticky rice however it is that you make sticky rice. I'm lucky that my Zojirushi makes it for me, but if you have to use a steamer, this looks like a reliable method.
While the rice is cooking, simmer coconut milk, sugar, and salt together on the stove top. Taste it and make sure it has a good hit of salt. (I like it with the salt and feel that it makes up for the reduced amount of sugar I use compared to restaurant versions of this dish.)
When the rice is done, stir in about 1 cup of the coconut-sugar mixture into the warm rice, reserving the rest for serving when you plate.
To serve, you can mold the rice into a small bowl or some other mold, then invert it onto your serving plate(s). Arrange mango on the side and drizzle more coconut mixture on everything. It can be served warm or at room temperature.
Share, if you're generous, or destroy the evidence, if you're not.
--
And for what we're eating this week:
P.S. Writing about coconut prepared two ways reminded me of the time I wrote about pumpkin: sweet+savory.
P.P.S. One other coconut PSA. Saw this recipe and I'm tempted to try it out!
My maternal grandfather's quick-and-dirty Malaysian chicken curry recipe uses a whole can of coconut milk and not very much water (in fact, as little as you can get by without burning the food), but I liked this reversal I found on Hungry Huy.
It calls for only half a cup of coconut milk to 4-5 cups of liquid. He uses a mix of chicken broth and water, but since I stock (couldn't help myself*) Costco's organic stock which isn't very salty, I use all stock in my version for extra flavor.
(*When the cartons of chicken stock in your pantry notice you checking on your supply a lot, do they say, "Are you stocking me?" Souper sorry for that. Not.)
I was pleasantly surprised with how far that half cup of coconut milk went, giving the whole pot just the right amount of creaminess and Southeast Asian flair, and so instead of disregarding the recipe and just throwing the rest of the can in, I decided to make coconut sticky rice with mangoes, because obviously.
 |
| You will be floating like this French bread after eating this. |
The leftovers are also amazing with noodles - such as vermicelli, udon, or by making a packet of ramen (spicy or regular) with some of the seasoning and broth, and throwing the curry into it, plus a poached-in-the-pot egg.
Actually, the egg can be eaten on any version of this dish. SEAsians were "putting an egg on it" way before it was the trendy thing to do. If you've never had a crispy fried egg with an oozing egg yolk over a bowl of curry rice, well, then, stop everything you're doing right now and get thee to a kitchen.
Vietnamese Chicken Curry (cà ri gà )
adapted from Hungry Huy
2 lb bone-in chicken thighs and drumsticks, marinated in 2 t salt and 2 T curry powder
1 large yellow onion, diced
4 cloves garlic, minced
2 stalks lemongrass, cut into 5" lengths (smash the base to expose more flavor, and cut lengthwise in half, if desired)
3 bay leaves, or a few stalks of curry leaves, if you are so lucky to have access
1 1/2 lb potatoes, cubed (~2")
3-4 carrots, cut into 3" lengths (the chunky look is nice for this soupy curry)
1/2 cup canned coconut milk (full-fat, try to use a Thai - not American - brand)
1 tsp sugar
4 cups chicken broth
extra curry powder to taste (I like Baba's, which can be found at Ranch 99, but a Vietnamese Madras curry powder would be great, too)
fish sauce and/or fermented shrimp paste, to taste
squeeze of lemon and/or cilantro, optional, for garnish
Marinate the chicken at least two hours in advance, or overnight. Don't be afraid to over-salt. This flavor will be dispersed into a pot of broth with over two pounds of vegetables, and salting the pot later can never match the level of flavor you get from pre-marination. (Pre-marinated murder?)
In a heavy-bottomed pot or Dutch oven, sear the chicken pieces in batches and set aside on a plate. Heat up more oil and sweat the onions in the pan. Add minced garlic, stir a few times, then add broth. Return chicken to the pot, along with sugar, bay leaves, lemongrass, carrots and potatoes.
(Hungry Huy has you par-fry the potatoes and carrots so they don't disintegrate into the broth, but I'm giving you the lazier version. Just cut your vegetables larger, and watch them so they don't melt.)
Bring to a boil, then lower and let simmer until everything is cooked, probably about 20 minutes. Stir in coconut milk. Taste for salt and add fish/shrimp sauce if it needs some extra funk. Serve with cilantro and lemon and with French bread.
Coconut Sticky Rice with Mangoes
1 1/2 to 2 cups Thai sweet rice
1 1/2 cups coconut milk (conveniently, what you will have leftover after you make the above recipe)
1/3 cup white sugar
1/4 t sea salt
2 mangoes (Champagne/Manila/Ataulfo are the best for this, as they are sweeter and less fibrous), cubed or sliced
Make sticky rice however it is that you make sticky rice. I'm lucky that my Zojirushi makes it for me, but if you have to use a steamer, this looks like a reliable method.
While the rice is cooking, simmer coconut milk, sugar, and salt together on the stove top. Taste it and make sure it has a good hit of salt. (I like it with the salt and feel that it makes up for the reduced amount of sugar I use compared to restaurant versions of this dish.)
When the rice is done, stir in about 1 cup of the coconut-sugar mixture into the warm rice, reserving the rest for serving when you plate.
To serve, you can mold the rice into a small bowl or some other mold, then invert it onto your serving plate(s). Arrange mango on the side and drizzle more coconut mixture on everything. It can be served warm or at room temperature.
Share, if you're generous, or destroy the evidence, if you're not.
--
And for what we're eating this week:
P.S. Writing about coconut prepared two ways reminded me of the time I wrote about pumpkin: sweet+savory.
P.P.S. One other coconut PSA. Saw this recipe and I'm tempted to try it out!
4/19/2017
Unmoored
Hi! I just need to check in and make sure I write/post after a week of vacation in Richmond, VA. It was so needed, more than I knew, and it's a little hard coming back to the grey and the gloom.
I don't know if the negative/blah feelings have to do with the weather, the environment, the lack of support I perceive, or if it's spiritual warfare, but for one week I was able to escape from it, and coming back I am reminded of how much I feel unmoored here.
So I'm contriving some goals (RIGHT NOW as I write this) and publishing them here to keep myself afloat until I feel better.
1. Get in my 10,000 steps. I had been doing really well with walking until the really cold months and I want to pick it up again.
2. Keep blogging. Sometimes it's hard to generate content, but the discipline is good for me. I feel like I'm trying to beat this depression like they do in AA, one day at a time.
3. Keep menu planning and keep cooking. I feel "flow" (as defined by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi) when I'm cooking: it's the perfect creative thing for me that's neither too easy nor too challenging to really enjoy myself. I've recently noticed that ethereal quality of "feeling at home with myself" (love that phrase from this article) while cooking lately, and I really treasure that, because I don't experience that feeling very often anymore these days.
4. Per my previous post, I'm going to try to meet up with friends more than once a week. I can't control the outcome (i.e., feeling socially energized or emotionally satisfied), but I can choose my actions.
5. Start a "thankful" list. I've talked once about how the word "gratitude" rubs me wrong, and I've since heard one other blogger/podcaster talk about it too, so it's not just me. It's funny how word choice can make such a big difference. I find I'm more empowered when I say "I'm thankful for..." or "I appreciate..." than when I say "I'm so grateful..." so if that's what it takes for me to be a more thankful person, I'll take it. With this goal, I will write down one thing I'm thankful for (or a moment that gave me joy) every day for a month, or til the end of May, and then see how it goes for me.
6. Be more open to how God is at work in my life. I'm on this interesting journey right now where I feel upside down with my faith. So much doesn't make sense to me, and it's hard to articulate what exactly that is. (Molly, your email had me thinking all week and I'm working on a response for you.)
7. Drink more water. (This was added to this list somewhat facetiously, because what list of goals does not including drinking more water?)
Alright, there it is, for everyone to see. Now I have to do it!
P.S. Anyone watched or watching 13 Reasons Why on Netflix? Let's discuss! (I took some notes on my phone while watching, marked by episode, so I can "live"-discuss with you without spoilers. Text me!)
P.P.S. Most ironic moment today: using the dictation function on my phone to send a text to communicate the acronym "LOL."
I don't know if the negative/blah feelings have to do with the weather, the environment, the lack of support I perceive, or if it's spiritual warfare, but for one week I was able to escape from it, and coming back I am reminded of how much I feel unmoored here.
So I'm contriving some goals (RIGHT NOW as I write this) and publishing them here to keep myself afloat until I feel better.
1. Get in my 10,000 steps. I had been doing really well with walking until the really cold months and I want to pick it up again.
2. Keep blogging. Sometimes it's hard to generate content, but the discipline is good for me. I feel like I'm trying to beat this depression like they do in AA, one day at a time.
3. Keep menu planning and keep cooking. I feel "flow" (as defined by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi) when I'm cooking: it's the perfect creative thing for me that's neither too easy nor too challenging to really enjoy myself. I've recently noticed that ethereal quality of "feeling at home with myself" (love that phrase from this article) while cooking lately, and I really treasure that, because I don't experience that feeling very often anymore these days.
4. Per my previous post, I'm going to try to meet up with friends more than once a week. I can't control the outcome (i.e., feeling socially energized or emotionally satisfied), but I can choose my actions.
5. Start a "thankful" list. I've talked once about how the word "gratitude" rubs me wrong, and I've since heard one other blogger/podcaster talk about it too, so it's not just me. It's funny how word choice can make such a big difference. I find I'm more empowered when I say "I'm thankful for..." or "I appreciate..." than when I say "I'm so grateful..." so if that's what it takes for me to be a more thankful person, I'll take it. With this goal, I will write down one thing I'm thankful for (or a moment that gave me joy) every day for a month, or til the end of May, and then see how it goes for me.
6. Be more open to how God is at work in my life. I'm on this interesting journey right now where I feel upside down with my faith. So much doesn't make sense to me, and it's hard to articulate what exactly that is. (Molly, your email had me thinking all week and I'm working on a response for you.)
7. Drink more water. (This was added to this list somewhat facetiously, because what list of goals does not including drinking more water?)
Alright, there it is, for everyone to see. Now I have to do it!
P.S. Anyone watched or watching 13 Reasons Why on Netflix? Let's discuss! (I took some notes on my phone while watching, marked by episode, so I can "live"-discuss with you without spoilers. Text me!)
P.P.S. Most ironic moment today: using the dictation function on my phone to send a text to communicate the acronym "LOL."
4/10/2017
On being a shy extrovert
"Vulnerability is [...] having the courage to show up and be seen when we have no control over the outcome." -- Brené Brown
Last week I wrote about feeling weary of feeling lonely. The writing of it was very hard to tease out, but - and I keep discovering this - as I pushed though things and disciplined myself to just write (without pressure to publish but just for the sake of doing it), I felt a lot lighter.
I'm not sure what came over me the day after that but in a moment of boldness I later posted on the Year of Creativity Facebook group (and y'all know I do not use Facebook) to introduce myself for the first time (3 months into the year!) and I decided to share my blog. (Many of the ladies have already shared their blogs, published articles, social media accounts, other projects, etc.)
I had yet to speak up on the group and so, in typical me fashion, I typed with trepidation. I couldn't help but share that I'm an Ennegram 6, and that I was thus afraid that publicly sharing my blog would cause me to stop writing.
I was overwhelmed by the outpouring of responses, the encouragement to keep going, and the reassurance that I am not alone.
Apparently I had been keeping these feelings of despair to myself because I didn't want to be a burden to other people. I didn't even want to put the words to paper because I felt like I deserved to feel the burden of it. (Such is the insidious nature of isolation, whether self-imposed or not.)
But now I wonder if the truest form of opening up isn't burdensome to others, but is instead an opportunity for others to see me as I am. It doesn't demand but rather gently invites.
The same evening after I took that step to share myself in internet land, I spontaneously invited two of my neighbors and their kids over to play in our yard after dinner. To my delight, they responded with quick and eager yesses.
The chill had let up a bit as the day had progressed (as is often the case in Seattle), and I exhilarated in the thrill of having friends to chat with on the back deck as we watched the kids play on the grass and the golden glow settled on the cherry blossoms.
After they left, and we put the kids down for bed, I found myself with an unexpected energy as I tidied up the toys and cleared the kitchen.
It was a simple gathering, in which there had been no planning or food (two of my specialties) - although decaf and Bailey's was offered - but which was thoroughly satisfying for me. And while we didn't have super deep and share-all-your-darkest-secrets conversation, I was the most energized I had been in a long time.
Since that evening I've made a simple connection for me that is changing my perspective in this current season of life for me.
The connection pertains to Susan Cain's Quiet, in which the author proposes two dimensions to personality, the introversion-extroversion axis and the orthogonal axis that measures how anxious/calm or stable an individual (whether introverted or extroverted) is.
(This article, also by Cain, maps those axes to the four humors, with which I am very familiar from Stephen Ministry training, and which also explains the nuanced difference between my and David's extroversion.)
The ah-ha moment for me is that I'm an anxious or shy extrovert. (I've always joked that I'm an extroverted homebody, as in, Everybody come to me, but this categorization of Anxious really puts some legs on this thing.)
I love being with people but I dislike putting myself out there. I think this predicament is amplified by being an Enneagram 6. I am excellent at being a chameleon: I wait to see what others think first, so that I can present only the parts of myself that are congruent with them.*
(*I think this is why blogging is super scary for me, because although some close friends know every dimension and plane of me, I am wont to keep different circles of friendships in which I am a certain version of me. This supposedly is to protect me (from ostracization?), but I do it at the expense of authenticity. It sounds sad when I type this out. Sigh.
So when I tell new friends that I have a blog, I sort of cringe and think, "oh no, they are going to read something that reveals a different part of me that I'm afraid they will reject me for." And there are definitely people I want to be friends with with whom I haven't shared my blog because I am afraid of what they will think.)
Naming this disparity for myself - the fact that I get energy from people but I'm shy to be the first to put myself out there - helped me realize how I actually have more control over my life than I thought I did. I may not have control over how many deep and abiding friendships I can secure (intentionally clingy word choice there), but I can take a simple step (which may or not be related) which is to get my extroverted needs met. This - at its simplest - means to to make plans with people, spend time with them, go out and find people. So adultish, but yes, it is, after all, my responsibility to get my needs met.
For when I feel energized I am a more interesting person which ultimately reinforces my efforts to develop deeper community.
So I guess my goal now is to be aware (and accepting) of my need to be with people (just as I respect and support introverts I know who need alone time to recharge) and, with self-compassion, support myself in the quest to fill my days with more friend time. Sounds like a plan, right? (Insert self-five.)
P.S. I just read the chapter in Quiet on Asian-Americans which discusses my hometown Cupertino and even mentions my high school (!). It made me wonder if I have not adjusted my introvert-extrovert scale to a different culture outside of the Bay.
P.P.S. If anyone else is reading Quiet, I hope you'll comment below and/or text me your thoughts. So far, I'm enjoying it, but also struggling with the lack of differentiation between being introverted and being quiet. I know she tries to bring up that point (and I mention this with the two axes above) but I still think that the analysis is confounded by a subtle confluence between extroversion and expressiveness. I struggle to believe that America or the West is actually necessarily more extroverted than other cultures, but rather that expressiveness and boldness and individualism are elevated in this culture. I don't believe extroversion and expressiveness are the same thing. Anyhoo, maybe I'm misreading this or projecting on it too much.
P.P.P.S. I'd love your comments! Being a grown up means I can "ask for what I want and honor the response" (Richo, How To Be An Adult). Well, this extroverted Enneagram 6 thrives on feedback so I would love to hear from you. :) Thanks, as always, for reading. This is such a good exercise for me, to write and then to be brave by sharing. Thank you so much for being here.
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