Hi! I just need to check in and make sure I write/post after a week of vacation in Richmond, VA. It was so needed, more than I knew, and it's a little hard coming back to the grey and the gloom.
I don't know if the negative/blah feelings have to do with the weather, the environment, the lack of support I perceive, or if it's spiritual warfare, but for one week I was able to escape from it, and coming back I am reminded of how much I feel unmoored here.
So I'm contriving some goals (RIGHT NOW as I write this) and publishing them here to keep myself afloat until I feel better.
1. Get in my 10,000 steps. I had been doing really well with walking until the really cold months and I want to pick it up again.
2. Keep blogging. Sometimes it's hard to generate content, but the discipline is good for me. I feel like I'm trying to beat this depression like they do in AA, one day at a time.
3. Keep menu planning and keep cooking. I feel "flow" (as defined by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi) when I'm cooking: it's the perfect creative thing for me that's neither too easy nor too challenging to really enjoy myself. I've recently noticed that ethereal quality of "feeling at home with myself" (love that phrase from this article) while cooking lately, and I really treasure that, because I don't experience that feeling very often anymore these days.
4. Per my previous post, I'm going to try to meet up with friends more than once a week. I can't control the outcome (i.e., feeling socially energized or emotionally satisfied), but I can choose my actions.
5. Start a "thankful" list. I've talked once about how the word "gratitude" rubs me wrong, and I've since heard one other blogger/podcaster talk about it too, so it's not just me. It's funny how word choice can make such a big difference. I find I'm more empowered when I say "I'm thankful for..." or "I appreciate..." than when I say "I'm so grateful..." so if that's what it takes for me to be a more thankful person, I'll take it. With this goal, I will write down one thing I'm thankful for (or a moment that gave me joy) every day for a month, or til the end of May, and then see how it goes for me.
6. Be more open to how God is at work in my life. I'm on this interesting journey right now where I feel upside down with my faith. So much doesn't make sense to me, and it's hard to articulate what exactly that is. (Molly, your email had me thinking all week and I'm working on a response for you.)
7. Drink more water. (This was added to this list somewhat facetiously, because what list of goals does not including drinking more water?)
Alright, there it is, for everyone to see. Now I have to do it!
P.S. Anyone watched or watching 13 Reasons Why on Netflix? Let's discuss! (I took some notes on my phone while watching, marked by episode, so I can "live"-discuss with you without spoilers. Text me!)
P.P.S. Most ironic moment today: using the dictation function on my phone to send a text to communicate the acronym "LOL."
Hooray for vacations, lists, goals, and making the labels section! I haven't watched 13 Reasons Why, but it seems to be the hot topic lately. I just passed this article on to a friend, maybe you'll find it interesting too: http://www.mbird.com/2017/04/finding-hope-after-13-reasons-why/
ReplyDeleteAlso, said friend is a school therapist and brought up that her students are reacting really strongly to the series. She was looking for resources approaching the series from a mental health angle. So if you run across anything let me know.
thanks, molly, for your comment love as always! yeah, the show was definitely very provocative. i think there are many different lenses with which to view and analyze the show, and at the end of the day, if it can be a conversation starter for people, that is a good thing. i do agree that there need to be more mental health resources at large. i'll let you know if i think of anything else. thanks again for your response!
DeleteI came across this article recently and thought it timely: it talks about "thin slices of joy": https://qz.com/818998/googles-former-happiness-guru-developed-a-three-second-brain-exercise-for-finding-joy/
ReplyDeleteI love that you're trying to find an expression of gratitude that is congruent with where you're at.
<3 thanks for the article, i love it. i think the best part is just that phase "thin slices of joy." i think i can adopt that :) thanks for sharing.
Deletethanks for your affirmation, too. for reading and understanding.
admittedly, it's the geekiness of the language "thin slice" that really gets me!
DeleteWhat an inspiring list! I whole heartedly support all of these. (Please write an post about "feeling at home with yourself" and what that means for you)
ReplyDeleteThanks, Christine. :) I love/hate your assignment to me ;p And I am still daydreaming about Lola in my arms nodding her head to stay with me. All the heart eyes. // You reading and thoughtfully responding to this post is a sweet encouragement to me and I feel your support with what I asked for at that dinner table, to help me create the community I desire here. <3
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